I need sleep

Sometimes i feel like all i do is complain..which i do. That being said, I am tired and emotionally drained and even more tired. Like exhausted.

It was a long weekend slept shivering under the stars Friday night the kids in the car and Saturday night smashed between kids and the boyfriend.

This all might explain why my emotional stability might be faltering a bit im scared and tired and terrified and i just said the same thing twice two different ways. Must be serious? I don't know I just don't want to lose what i have given my past i can say im not entirely to blame for having that ingrained fear. Im not that same person and Michael shouldn't be compared because he is nothing like what i had last time he is...perfect for me. As long as i can hold on and not totally screw everything up i will be just fine.

I am happy. Im tired and happy and scared and more tired. I need a nap and another weekend to lay in bed and recover...am i getting old? Bah

Work is stressful and the full effects haven't even begun yet everyone seems to be on edge which doesn't help im trying to ignore them and so far so good im keeping to myself and as soon as they tell me what i can do ill start until then...ill wait ;)

Anyways ill post soonish.

-Manda