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I am in a very emotionally vulnerable place right now, My mental state took a hit yesterday and put me in a funk that I'm having a really hard time shaking my brain takes over and i start over thinking and anything you say to me makes me feel like everything really is going to fall apart.

Ill shake it it just sucks while I'm in it. Ayden is with Ali today and i think that's probably for the best because I'm lost and not sure what to say to her and he is good at making us both melt and not fight. I love her and I'm torn because i have no idea what I'm supposed to do next I'm trying to make everything all better and i don't know if i can and i don't want to lose whats mine and I'm so fucking scared. None of this makes sense and i might contemplate going into further detail later but right now its hard enough for me to focus..

Ill post sometime soon.

-Amanda