Anyone miss me?

The deafening silence answer's for you.

Hello! Hi! how are you!?

I am OK. When you tell people I'm ok, They give you that look you know the one that asks whats really wrong why just ok? At this point i like to walk away because i don't need the question's i am JUST OK! nothing more nothing less.

Random people messaging me on Facebook to ask me questions about my life. People i haven't spoken to in years or ones that i just said in the hall ways of high school. Really people you have NOTHING better to do with your time? Well i do. And yes i just ignored you on facebook go cry and post hate messages about it i thrive on this shit!

Anyways in real news I am STILL unemployed still...sigh at least unemployment extensions came through and i should be paid in the next two days for the last two weeks missed payments. I'm one of the lucky ones people had not received checks in almost two months.

School is at a stalemate they tell me i cant go until spring, i tell them to shove it ill do it my own damn self. Stupid school. If i wanted to be treated like trash i would have registered for the University not the community college.

Also in the last month i have walked my ass off... literally according to a friend well not all the way but its smaller! I'm averaging about 20 miles a week *pause this is where you go umm are you crazy and give me that look* Yes 20 not exaggerating either wish i was my feet Hurt! Its my stress relief and i just wake up cant sleep and get on the treadmill not the best thing to be doing but its better then late night eating. i don't think i have lost weight but then again i haven't weighed.i have lost an inch and a half around my waist wish I'm wondering if its more from my back side but whatever before it was just my calves it was working as long as it keeps going up and hits the belly region soon ill be fine.

So...Its 3:22 in the morning and my son is wide awake and my legs hurt I'm going to finish my last half mile of the morning and try to convince him sleep is not the enemy.

Angry.

Angry is not exactly the right word, more like livid. Not directed at just one person but at a whole government.

I'm not sure anymore that going into political science is my best choice... i love it but i don't see being able to change anything. This country has gone to shit, and alot of people blame the current president since the right is telling them to do so. he is not perfect and he has lost his ability to have balls when it comes to just about anything. But i blame the last four presidents the ones who deregulated everything over spent and blamed it on this poor man.

I blame the congressmen and women the senators and just about every other branch of government out there for sitting on there fat money making asses in seats they should have given up 30 years ago in some cases. I want them all to spend a month or two or hell six in my shoes someone from middle to low class because god knows not one of them has been one of us ever. to be elected you have to be rich and once there you get kick backs mad vacations and a nice salary and great benefits. And they don't care about us because like i said they have never been us, they also don't care because we are required to pay their retirement after they have served. I hope their worthless lives are worth it. I wish they were like the rest of us because if i did the shit they did to my fellow Americans i couldn't sleep at night.

Democrats need to grow a pair, and realize the rights agenda campaign is working they are fooling low class into believe their bull shit and the dems think oh well our people are smart enough to realize. Get your ASSES out there and tell them whats going on because most of your voters are NOT smart enough to understand whats going on and are being bombarded by news,emails and miss information from radio hosts. Get them good educations and there wont be this problem...hell get them educations at all...

I'm so done. I'm so frustrated.I have always showed pride for my country i have always loved it. I have never been less in love with anything in my life.

Happy fourth America. Keep turning a blind eye to your neighbors. Eventually something will give... and I'm afraid it will be something worse then what we are dealing with now.

Maybe i should move to china..at least id have a job.

I am not apologizing again

I am not! Because anyone who reads this NEVER comments so i will NOT say im sorry for NOT posting ever again.

SO there.

The End.

Until next time.

I again Apologize

I apologize for being absent. I don't have much to report as i am still unemployed. Congress wont pass a filing deadline on unemployment extensions and i have only used one no where near what others have received but because i lost my job later then others i don't receive the same benefits.

People say they care they don't because they have no idea what its really like. They say we want to live on unemployment we don't! that's the last thing i want! I just want a job where i can support myself and my child i don't think that is to much to ask. When employers are purposely hiring at lower pay rates even though they can pay what the position is worth that should be punishable as well.

I cant make excuses though i have to get back into school this stupid cycle has to stop. I'm not sure what i have done wrong i have worked full time since i was 15 i made a life for myself and house cars and of course debt i worked hard in each job i had advanced and when the time was right took a better paying job. I guess they want me to have to take food stamps and other government assistance in two weeks when my unemployment runs out.

As the end approaches

So tomorrow is my birthday, As it approaches i become more and more ok with the thought i staying in bed all day covers pulled over my head.

Ill only be 24, to me this feels like the end. I will be 24 with an almost 4 year old newly divorced and jobless. This my friends is the end.

I would like to again say I'm sorry for not posting in awhile nothing of great importance has happened. Me and the Ex are getting a long as per usual, fighting for my house a job and life to continue on a daily basis while trying to occupy my time with meaningless things like baking bread and making clam chowder for the first time which by the way was awesome and i ate my weight in it.

Add that to my end list overweight 24 with an almost 4 year old newly divorced and jobless...that seems more accurate. Anyone out there have questions for me?

Also if you can boycott Arizona for anything i suggest doing so, fine find illegals but there policy only enforces racial profiling and just gives a cop the reason to discriminate like they need more reason.

Anyone out there?

I ask but i know the answer, Sometimes the smallest things make us the happiest. Sometimes its a complete stranger and most times that makes it all the more enjoyable. I know im being cryptic but its my blog i can be!

I had a decent week, even is said week is not yet over. I spent more time then usual with my mother Ayden enjoyed it seeing Nana as she requests to be called. She has started doing Eyelash extensions and was teaching me how to do them i am not nearly as good as her but i got 75 dollar lash extensions for free which is always a good time. Its my first time having them so will see how long they last. It is nice to have a mom that will color,cut and go to the beauty supply with you for free. I have been privileged in that respect i have never really had to pay for things like that and my makeup habit takes up resources that i would have to use for those things, i really need a job to continue this habit.

I applied for FASFA (financial aid for schooling) that's not the technical name but you get the picture, i applied for over 30 jobs last week alone i had one call back one interview and about 30 denial letters back. Discouraging to say the least i have applied this week but nearly as much i honestly know i have been double applying to places but what other options do i have? Maybe i can get help and go to school knowing my luck ill either make to much or to little money that's how it goes for me. But if they can help and i can work part time and go to school that would be great.


Anyways im adventure for making home made pizza is finally on im in the finishing stages ill let you know if i totally bombed!

Long time no blog.

Sorry i have been MIA, not really i doubt anyone really cares but sometimes i really miss telling everyone my business in a fun and entertaining way ha...

Not much has happened other then the fact that i have a job interview on Monday, not that I'm excited about it because it doesn't pay enough to even cover my daycare so even if i got it i couldn't take it. Also I'm doubting ill get it but i cant be such a downer right? wrong i am one so there!

Anyways Ayden is doing great, sometimes i wonder how he got so damn smart.

Also today i made my first loaf of bread, it sucked lol but it wasn't horrible it was edible just a little squishy in the middle. Today for dinner i will tackle making a pizza so wish me luck again... well maybe not i just realized i forgot the sauce and i don't feel like going to the store i know that is premature since its like one in the morning but i can honestly say ill probably be to lazy later to bother.

Well i hope everyone is doing well hope to update soon. maybe with good paying job news.